A Proper Copper Coffee Pot
by David Frickin' Tennant
Summary: All Ianto wants is to make a proper cup of coffee in a proper copper coffee pot.


**Title**: A Proper Copper Coffee Pot

**Author**: David Frickin' Tennant

**Disclaimer**: I don't own this. I wish I did. But I don't.

**Rating**: You know, I really don't know. Let's call it T for some language 'cause Ianto's gutted.

**Summary**: Owen breaks Ianto's coffee pot, and he's not at all happy about it.

**Note**: This is quite possibly the crackiest thing I've ever written. I apologize in advance. This is for Pearl, as she gave me the lovely prompt word "coffee" on Tumblr.

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><p>Ianto smiled, grinding the fresh, black beans he had bought just to try out the new coffee pot in the Hub. It was what he'd always wanted: an old-fashioned copper coffee pot. He'd only bothered his boss for two months about it, and after the six-hundredth time of being pouted at and sex-deprived, Jack finally gave in.<p>

"You have your coffee pot now, Ianto," Jack said as he looked the thing over. He had no idea how to use one of these things. Sure, he'd seen them before, but that didn't mean he knew how to use it. "It better make fantastic coffee."

Ianto rolled his eyes. "It's not the _pot_ that makes excellent coffee, sir," he said as he puttered. "It's the beans. But, I mean, the pot is always nice."

"This thing was expensive, Ianto."

He shrugged and turned, leaning to kiss Jack before anyone else could see. He pecked his lips and looked at him as though he were a child, grinning. "Thanks, Jack."

Jack only sighed in response. "Bring me up a cup of that coffee when it's done, okay?" He received a nod and a "Yes, sir," from the Welshman, then made his way up to his office, letting Ianto to his business.

After the beans had been ground, Ianto inhaled their aroma. Dark-roasted Arabica beans from Puerto Rico. Sure, they were a little more expensive than the usual kind, but the first pot of coffee made in this pot should be special.

Ianto measured everything out just so, placing the coffee pot together just so. Everything was absolutely perfect and he was as happy as could be.

That is, until Owen rushed in about ten minutes after the fact.

"Ianto. Coffee."

"Uh, it's just finished brewing. Let me get you a cup, yeah?"

"Yeah, yeah, sure. Whatever, fine."

Ianto sighed and rolled his eyes once more, fixing the coffee just how Owen had liked it: black, no sugar, and one ice cube to cool it off just so. He turned and handed it to the impatient medic, who skulked off to his table and sat down to drink it.

"It tastes different," he observed.

"That's because I used different beans. Higher quality, I think."

"Sure, sure." Owen waved him quiet with his hand, rubbing his face before he put his glasses on and took another sip.

The day wore on like normal. Jack got a lead about something strange in Cardiff and devised a brilliant plan of action with the aide of the others, Tosh did a little research, Owen snarked and complained about having seven more aliens to cut up, and Gwen kept her mouth shut, making eyes at anything with a penis while swearing she was in love with Rhys and she wasn't just getting married because no one else wanted her.

_What kind of company do I work for..._ Ianto wondered, cleaning up his little station—heaven, he preferred to call it—as the others rushed around to gather things. He stopped to admire the copper pot that rested on the counter. He loved it already. It was now his favourite part of the Hub.

"Ianto, watch over the place while we're gone," Jack commanded, sounding more like his mother did when she would leave himself and Rhiannon alone in the family flat while she did some shopping. Ianto only nodded with a wave of his hand, shooing them out the door.

Owen slung his bag over his shoulder as he passed, knocking the copper pot to the floor.

It broke.

To say Ianto's heart shattered was an understatement. "You broke it," he stated, staring at the shambles on the metal flooring. "Absolutely destroyed it." The pot had flown and was now dented. Worse yet, the handle had fallen off.

Ianto pouted as Owen winced and rushed out the door.

"He fucking broke my coffee pot..."


End file.
